Be upfront and open about your concerns about the STD
The first time you learn that someone has herpes, it can be a very frightening experience. The average person doesn’t know much about common STD. It’s a taboo topic in most households where they learn such things. The information about sexually transmitted disease gathered from friends is often grossly inaccurate. Unless your friend is a doctor, they probably aren’t an expert when it comes to STDs. That’s the blunt truth that everyone needs to be aware of. When you first hear someone has herpes, it can send shivers down your spine. No need to say that it’s your most intimidate partner who may have the viral disease.
Sit down and have the talk
You’re going to need to talk with your partner if you plan on being sexually active. If you’re not going to go down that path, then there’s no need to talk about it at all. You can leave the subject where it is. But, if you are planning on having sex, then you’re going to want to educate yourself about it. No relationship can grow if it’s based on lies. You need a rock solid foundation for a relationship to survive and thrive. Feeling comfortable talking about anything and everything is a must. Yes, that means you’re going to have to talk about the herpes virus.
There is no such thing as a stupid question
You may feel uncomfortable asking some questions. Your partner may feel uncomfortable answering them. There must come the point when two adults can talk about things of a sexual nature. If your relationship continues to grow, then you’re going to have many more conversations about sex. There’s nothing wrong or sinister about sex. The only time sex becomes sinister is if you’re holding back information. If you know you have an STD and don’t tell your partner, then that’s wrong.
Don’t be shy about the two of talking to a doctor
What do you do if you believe this person could be your soul mate? It’s not just a fling, and you’re terrified of the idea of viral infections. What you do is set up a session for both of you to talk to a doctor. It could be your doctor or theirs; it doesn’t matter. If you have any questions, then just ask. Don’t be shy about your partner being there. You’re going to have to deal with herpes for the rest of your relationship. It will become easier to talk about. Right now it feels awkward, and you’re not sure about all of this. Hopefully, those feelings will go away after you speak to a doctor. You need to get this straightened out. It may take going to a doctor and talking to them about it. If your partner really is your soul mate, they’ll put up with a little uncomfortableness at the doctor’s office.
The questions aren’t going to end
There will come a time when you have fewer questions about your partner’s herpes infection. They won’t ever come to an end. Your partner will deal with outbreaks of genital herpes and other aspects of the virus. This is a reality that you’re going to have to deal with. It’s worth dealing with and taking seriously if you truly love the person. There isn’t a good reason why you shouldn’t invest the time in educating yourself. The most important aspect of learning about sexual contact and herpes is that you’ll be able to protect yourself and help your partner as they cope with cure for the virus.
Allow your feelings to grow when dealing with herpes dating
When you first learned the person you fell in love with had herpes it was a big shock. It probably rocked your world. Now you’re left trying to pick up the pieces. A million questions are going through your mind right about now. None of them seem to make sense in the slightest. How could you have fallen in love with someone who has herpes? What do you do now? These are all questions that are normal to ask yourself in a situation like this. It’s essential for you to realize that this isn’t the end of the world. The new love of your life deserves to be given a chance. The fact that they have herpes doesn’t have to be a deal breaker.
Take a deep breath and educate yourself
You need to calm down. Somehow try to pull it together. No one is ever going to say that finding out someone you love has herpes is an easy thing. It’s not easy. No one ever brushes off news like this. However, you need to realize that it’s not the deal ender that you think it is. You can and should allow your feels to grow. You already have some feelings for this person. They are unique in your eyes and them having herpes doesn’t change that. All it means is that they have a medical condition that you’ve got to be concerned about. It doesn’t mean that you can’t grow old and happy with this person.
Anger, confusion, and sadness is normal
It’s normal to feel these things when you learn that someone you care so deeply about has herpes. Allow yourself to feel these feelings. Suppressing feelings is never a good thing. You should also be open and honest about what you’re going through. A person who cares about you will understand. They must realize that you’re going to have a lot of questions. Telling someone you have herpes isn’t the end of the conversation, it’s the beginning. If they treat it as if it’s the end, then you’re definitely in big trouble. It means they aren’t going to be as forthcoming as needed to deal with this head-on.
Grow as a couple together
You’ll get over this hurdle. You will be educating yourself and being very transparent about everything. Marriage is not out of the question for someone who has herpes. A person with herpes can even produce healthy children. You can build a life together after overcoming this little bump in the road. The size of the bump will become less over time. At first, the bump feels like it’s a mountain. After you become educated about the herpes virus, it’ll be a tiny little molehill. It takes time to get to that point, and the two of you will get there together.
Happiness should be the end goal of everyone. The way you achieve happiness is by falling in love and having a family. There is no greater happiness in the world than being a spouse and a parent. You and your partner can achieve those even if one of you has herpes and the other doesn’t. The foundation of your relationship will be built upon honesty and understanding. The rest will come as a natural byproduct of your love.
It is wise to admit that depression rates among young singles diagnosed with STD is on the increase and needs urgent attention. An increase in suicidal thoughts among adults is a red sign that responsible parents and loved ones should take into consideration to save the situation before it gets out of hand.
Besides the embarrassment and agony of learning that you are infected with STD, there is hope in knowing that it is manageable. STD is not a fatal illness and should not be the cause of panic and extreme strain psychologically. Today, the virus has infected a large portion of the American population across all ages and classes of singles. In fact, based on recent surveys, scientists have suggested that one of four women and one out of every five men are infected with herpes in the US. What is most amazing is the fact that despite these high rates, most of the victims are unaware of their condition. If you are infected, you do not need to worry and get depressed because you are not alone.
It is important to note that singles living with the virus can still lead long happy and romantically satisfying lives. They can still maintain their normal lives while managing their condition with medication. However, the stigma that comes with knowledge and spread in the society is detrimental. It is the cause of depression in many young singles and a likely cause of suicide. STD and dating remain a problem facing these singles when it should not be a hindrance to experience a life full of love and happiness.
Panic and Worry
After the first bout of the outbreak, it is common for most singles to slump into stress that eventually leads to depression. Although the frequency of subsequent outbreaks can be reduced with suppressing therapy, depression is a bigger enemy to restored or sustained health. The most complicated issue, especially among the singles, is dating with STD. STD and dating is increasingly a stressing issue and the reason for depression. However, when approached with openness and honesty, the condition is embraceable and manageable.
The initial panic and worry that comes from the realization that one is infected are based on the stigma that follows. The fear of being rejected by a sexual partner and the discrimination among social circles and friends. In the effort to manage the disease, STD and sexual contact become the most complicated issue to approach. Since the disease is easily transferable by all forms of sexual contact, victims get depressed about having to change their sexual habits.
Singles and Depression
There are many recently conducted surveys that link depression to STD diagnosis. With the high increase of infections today, depression rates equally rise with a direct proportionality. Early statistics indicated that adults infected with the HSV-2 virus were twice as likely to be depressed compared to those who did not. These rates have since increased with the times, as more singles are falling victims to the virus. The surveys also found that depression is caused by the perception that the patients led a careless sexual life. They are assumed to be singles who take sexual risks or are promiscuous.
STD may be the cause of depression in singles but depression also increases the frequency of STD outbreaks. This connection keeps singles in a psychological maze, which is hopeless and infuriating.
Dealing with Depression
The best way to deal with depression is; find singles or someone who is infected too and talk to them. This will be therapeutic and you will heal faster from depression. You will also experience fewer outbreaks thanks to a good psychological well being. When you meet singles with STD, you will not be afraid to open up and talk freely about the challenges, stigma, and share the best methods of dealing with the outbreak.
You may also hire the services of a psychiatrist or counselor. Call them whenever you need guidance or help to manage the disease. Apart from a professional counselor, a close loved one such as an elderly family member is a good choice for a confidant to help you talk about the disease and the challenges that come with it.
Dating while living with STD is different. In fact, the thought of hooking up is itself a challenge. You have to consider multiple factors and overcome yourself before making the bold step of asking someone for a close relationship.
The stigma in society is the main reason people living with an STD choose to confine themselves and lead a quiet and miserable life. Also, the mode of contraction determines if an individual regains normalcy in life or considers the lives shattered. Unlike common belief, STD is not always about promiscuous living. Sometimes, it is an accident or uncertain circumstances. In fact, some people can only speculate how they ended up with an STD.
Dating with STD
The fact that it is a lifetime condition is frustrating. You have to face the reality of living with a condition for the rest of your life. Some sexually transmitted infections are severe others are manageable. Also, it depends on an individual’s immunity. Like with herpes, the disease barely shows on the outside but other chronic infections like AIDS will affect an individual’s boy and will be easy to tell.
How the disease affects your body has everything to do with dating. First, if your appearance is impaired, you will likely be less confident in public because you will imagine everyone knows of your condition and the exact cause. It is a difficult position to be in a society let alone narrowing down to a romantic partner.
A hookup can be of great challenge when living with an STD. You are always insecure and oversensitive over comments of people around you. One is prone to hurt whenever negative comments are made in relation to sexually transmitted infections. Most people tend to be anti-social after the diagnosis because of fear of harsh judgment. In most cases, this is true; the society harshly judges people with STDs by linking it to loose living.
People have different perceptions of relationships. For teenagers, they are concerned about fun and experience in the dating process. It is not much about the future. The focus of teenagers in a relationship is how fun and entertaining the partner is and how much time they can spend together in movies an outdoor activities. Usually, there is no long-term goal in teenage relationships. If there is an STD case, it can be perceived in two ways.
The relationship can be easy and fun considering the entertainment and activities of the moment is the main goal, there is no much worry about the future with respect to lifetime commitments. On the other hand, it can be difficult for teenagers to relate to an STD infected partner because they are considered a risk and possible ruin to future life.
When dating while living with an STD, an individual cherishes the relationship considering finding another understanding person and going through the stages of judgment and explanation is hard. With teenagers, there is a lot of time to have fun and experiment with different partners with different personalities. This is also the same case with people free from STDs. There is less consideration in hooking up with someone; it is all about desirable features and personality compatibility. However, when it comes to dating with STD, the other party has to engage in critical thinking and probably consult and spend time with counselors before making a decision.
To people with STD, once they are in a relationship they hold on to it and give their very best to make it a success. The truth is, it is hard for them to find another one.
Sex and dating
Sex is the main cause of STDs. Also, sex is a key characteristic of dating. People may have different opinions on the appropriate stage to have sex in a relationship but the basis is it is part of dating. While there are risks, sex has its benefits. It can be a defining stage for lovers. Sex helps relationships to mature. You know your partner better and settle with emotions.
Dating is a process with multiple stages, which define the success or failure of the relationship.
Find Long Term Relationships at PositiveSingles.com
Why people just diagnosed positive most need STD dating sites
Does Herpes Increase the risk of getting HIV?
Dating is hard enough. Dating with an STD is harder, but when its an incurable STI, rejection is part of the norm. Herpes spreads fast and has affected 1 out of 50 people on earth. In the U.S., the rates are higher than this. Although the statistic seems scary, it is totally possible to successfully date with an STI. You can still find love if you do right. First, beware that you will meet quite some rejection.
Rejection of people living with Herpes is not uncommon. It is one of the biggest reasons for formation of positive singles. This organization seeks to expose the world to the reality of the safety of dealing with spouses infected with Herpes. It is totally possible to find and sustain love with an infected person. The unspoken issue arising is always how to practice safe sex without getting a partner infected. A bigger issue is the stigma and stereotyping that comes with it. No one wants to be associated with the public image and reputation that comes with dating or living with Herpes. The organization seeks to fight against this world perception but you can also do it on your own.
Rejection is not only among people infected with Herpes. This means that the way of dealing with rejection towards a bias partner should be similar in tactic and technique to other forms of rejection. Dating with STD should not be stressful enough to end your hopes of eve find love. Here are some of the steps to consider making your relationship work even when infected.
Basically, if you are not prepared to be rejected, you are not prepared for dating at all
Just like in every other area of life, you need to be prepared for the worst. It will help you carry a good attitude when you fail. This means you will be coming back up again and trying more. Dating with STDs don’t have to be a special case because is just that, rejection. If you have worked hard to impress your partner and invested in the relationship, it will hurt a lot to face rejection because of a condition you cannot change. It is, however, important to consider the possibility of rejection. You may, therefore, be upfront with the issue and state it early in the relationship to avoid a huge lose deep into the relationship.
STD is only one of the reasons you may risk, and it is not the most complicated one
The fear of the unknown is a bigger problem here. It is imperative to admit that dating with STD is not the most complicated problem on earth. You should not give up on love just because you have a scar to live with the name of an STD like Herpes. Many people are living with it and have stable relationships and marriages that last through their lifetimes. The stigma that comes with the knowledge of the infection is the reason for this risk. There are many reasons you may be rejected anyway so instead of worrying about the STD, you would rather proceed with pursuance of the relationship until the real reason of the rejection emerges. The STD may only be an excuse for your partner to leave because it is the easiest and most understandable reason. When you are left because of the STD, you will probably accept easily and blame yourself for it. Instead of blaming yourself, you should change your attitude and proceed with dating without the fear of rejection.
Even on dating sites for people who have STD already, you might also get rejected
Being rejected is not completely dependent on your STD condition. People living with the same problem as you may also reject you for other reasons apart from it. Focus, therefore, on building a love relationship bond so strong that no excuse or reason will come up to destroy it at any time. Let your STD condition be a secondary issue like the rest of the other issue when dating with STD.
Why people just diagnosed positive most need STD dating sites
Find Long Term Relationships at PositiveSingles.com
How to Share STD Status With Our Dating Partner
The online dating crime against STD positive people is mainly online discrimination, the risk of being stigmatized and Sexual bias. The only way to escape online dating crime if you are STD positive is to find a place where people understand what you need and your current state. STD dating sites and STD support groups are particularly suitable to keep STD positive singles unhurt.
Sometimes dating with STD does not always go as smoothly as one could possibly expect. Although it is not a new concept, its efficiency is not fully understood by most people. The whole point of opening up about your current condition may also be received positively by all people in your social media pages and varied websites. There are thus numerous online dating crimes that are committed against STD positive individuals.
Being an individual who suffers from an STD prompts one to be automatically treated in a different way as compared to the other people around you. Online discrimination has been one of the reasons as to why most people do not put their health condition open for the media to view and criticize. Even your closest online friends and people who know nothing about you treat you differently from before.
STD dating also puts you at risk of being stigmatized by your online followers. By creating an online profile about yourself, you practically tell the whole world that you are sick. People will literally judge you for contracting the STD and this poses a barrier to the healing process. Social STD stigma simply means that other people online critic you and condemn you being infected with the condition. STD stigma is often very common and strong.
Sexual bias refers to a situation whereby one is treated unfairly due to their condition. In our case, STD positive individuals are treated unfairly with the notion that they did something really wrong and that is why they are infected with the STD. Also, these individuals are most likely to be verbally abused by other online platform users like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. Some of the words used to describe them or even answer to their concerns may be harsh and hard for them to deal with. The reason why online crimes against STD positive people occur is mainly that not all people understand what these people need and what they are going through.
How to avoid online dating crime
As mentioned earlier, the main reason for discriminating STD positive people is lack of knowledge on their condition and for some it is ignorance. Therefore, the only way to escape online dating crime if you are STD positive is to find a place where people understand what you need and your current state. Being among a group of people who share similar woes as you give you hope and you gain the confidence that you are not going through the situation alone. Also, some problems like stress and fear are reduced by just being in a group where you everyone else relates to your situation. Fellow STD positive patients will duly understand that you do not need negative criticism but rather you need support to get through the disease. In such a place, you will not encounter discrimination of any kind, verbal abuse or even be stigmatized for being infected with STD.
Where should we do?
The safest places to stay away from online crime are online support groups and STD dating sites. Although the sites are not always the best places for some people who are trying to fit into their new situation, it offers enough support and also one might get a life partner, date and maybe even settle down later. STD dating sites are absolutely free for the interested persons and the websites are full of helpful information that aims at offering all the required support to the individuals.
On the other hand, online support groups are particularly helpful. First, they keep you busy thus offering a solution to depression since you are able to interact with people with similar situation. In these groups, you are able to meet the largest number of people that suffer similar stress, depression, and fears as you. They share how they have been able to deal with the situation and maybe by employing their strategies you stand a better chance at dealing with the same problems.