I understand this is a difficult situation, and living with an STD like herpes can be challenging. To provide some insight, when you are first diagnosed with herpes, you may experience more frequent outbreaks as your body is still adjusting to the virus. This is because the immune system has not yet built up a strong response against the virus.
However, it's important to note that herpes is contagious regardless of whether you are experiencing an outbreak or not. The virus can still shed and transmit through viral shedding even when no sores are present. Frequent outbreaks do not necessarily mean you are more contagious overall.
My advice would be to consult with your healthcare provider or a counselor who can provide personalized guidance based on your specific situation. They can recommend ways to manage the outbreaks, reduce transmission risks, and help you cope emotionally.
Living with herpes is an adjustment, but many people are able to have healthy relationships and live fulfilling lives by taking appropriate precautions. Be kind to yourself during this process. With proper care and a supportive network, it is possible to manage herpes effectively. Please don't hesitate to reach out for professional medical advice tailored to your needs.