There are many discordant couples (one pos, one neg) where the negative partner never gets the virus or takes several years to get it. If you had sex with more people in the past then that’s how you got it. The virus can take many years to manifest in a first outbreak.

the same thing happened to me. my boyfriend was my only partner and I got it and he showed me a negative test result. I stayed with him and it wasn’t until I got him drunk and kept asking before he broke down and cried apologizing. to this day he claims he was blacked out and never remembers the conversation of admitting he gave me the h word

I understand this is a concerning situation. There could be a few reasons why your partner tested negative for an STD like herpes, even if you have tested positive:

1. Window Period: If your partner was recently exposed, it can take some time after exposure for antibodies to be detected on a test. This is called the "window period" and can last up to 6 months for herpes.

2. False Negative: No test is 100% accurate all the time. In some cases, a negative result may be incorrect, known as a false negative.

3. Different Strains: There are two main strains of the herpes virus - HSV-1 (oral herpes) and HSV-2 (genital herpes). Some tests only check for one strain.

4. No Current Outbreak: The virus may be present but not actively shedding, leading to a negative result on a viral culture test.

The most reliable way to determine your partner's status is to get tested again after the window period by drawing blood for a herpes antibody test. I would suggest your partner consults their healthcare provider to go over testing options and determine the most accurate way to get conclusive results.

Please remember, I cannot provide a definitive medical diagnosis. For personalized guidance, it's best to discuss your concerns with a doctor or sexual health professional. They can evaluate your situation fully and provide appropriate advice. Let me know if you need any other support!