JohnJr65 winked at me! He later told me that he doesn't know what possessed him to wink at me with me living way down in NC. I told him that perhaps because I was born and raised in Maine, that that may've been why my profile popped up in his search.
JohnJr65 and I spoke over the phone for a month prior to our meeting. Our conversation just flowed, so naturally, like a couple of old friends. It was his suggestion that he make plans to travel down from Maine to meet me....though a few times he got a bit overwhelmed where I wouldn't hear from him for several days. As it turned out, he just needed time to think. Were the tables turned, I think I'd have done the same. JohnJr65 doesn't have any children and I have two boys. It's a lot to put on his plate, especially when he was previously married to a woman with two sons who deeply resented him. Needless to say, that marriage didn't work out because he and his (then) wife weren't unified and her boys divided them bitterly. For him this is dejavu all over again, EXCEPT that my boys are VERY respectful (as he found out).
I invited him down for Christmas and he came down. With my 82 year old Mother, who flew in from Texas to spend Christmas with us, JohnJr65, myself, my 19 year old son, Zack, and my 10 year old son, Sean, had the most BEAUTIFUL Christmas together. My boys took an instant liking to him and he felt right at home. My Mom fell right in love with him and he was calling her "Mom" in no time. They shared many laughs together.
He stayed with us for a total of 5 days, I believe. Before I had to roll back out (over the road driver), discussion had turned to him making plans to move down from Maine to start a life with us.
Well, he arrived back home in Maine and once again became a bit overwhelmed with planning a move. A few days had passed in silence while he took some more time to absorb the enormity of such a feat. When he finally called me, several days later, I told him that he was putting too much pressure on himself as none of the conversation of his moving was brought up by me (not that I didn't welcome the idea). I told him to just relax and take one day at a time. He's a "get 'r done" kind of man, which was quite apparent when we all arrived at my house two days before Christmas with not a decoration to be seen on display nor a gift wrapped. We all hit the ground running and within a day and a half, we had everything up, shipped for and wrapped ready to celebrate! What was so special was that although it was busy, straight out, it was all laughter and joy....no stress, whatsoever.
JohnJr65 originally wanted to be moved down within a month, or so, but we're now shooting for springtime....March or April. Moving isn't a matter of "IF", but "WHEN", as he has said.
I don't want to put the wagon before the horse, but I've made it clear to him that failure of this relationship is NOT an acceptable option for me. I have promised him that I will give 100% and he has agreed to do the same. We will approach all issues, pertaining to my boys, as a team and not allow either boy to manipulate one against the other. He may not be a dad, but he has SO much to bring to the table. My boys need a man to teach them how to become respectful young men, themselves. I love how he so naturally interacted with them. He was firm but yet allowed both of the boys to enjoy his presence, and he theirs. I have no doubt that we'll run into obstacles, but with open communication we should have no trouble overcoming them. I've told Bob (his real name) that I can't offer him a perfect relationship, as I don't believe such a relationship exists. But what I can offer him, at all times, is respect and tenderness.
Like I began to say, earlier, I don't want to be so bold by predicting what the future holds for us, but I wouldn't rule out marriage in the future. I've already told Bob that I want this relationship to be the last one for me. I want to commit whatever time I have left in this life to him.
The only pointer, or bit of advice I can give is for members to have plenty of patience. There are players and sleaze balls on the site, but there are also good, honest people with integrity....like my JohnJr65, giggle. You just have to be persistent. I've been Blessed...indeed.
Thank you, PS!